


JDox One Shots

by adventurouswallflower (destieldearie)



Category: Scrubs (TV)
Genre: M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-22 00:53:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15570147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destieldearie/pseuds/adventurouswallflower
Summary: These are just the one shots or drabbles I write and don't feel are long enough for their own post





	1. Chapter 1

JD groaned in frustration as he stood in the mirror trying to fix his tie for what felt like the hundredth time in the last hour. He was about to give up when Perry stepped next to him in the mirror. “I shouldn’t wear a tie if I can’t actually tie it,” he moaned and Perry rolled his eyes and stepped behind him.  
“Give it here, Newbie,” he whispered in JD’s ear. As JD was undoing the tie, he felt himself being pulled into a rough kiss. It seemed to go on forever as Perry bit at his lip and JD started to lose himself. When it was over, and his lips felt bruised, Perry stepped back and finished untying the horrible knot JD had somehow managed around his neck.   
“You’re only supposed to move the wide end. Then it goes under and over the small end, up and through. There,” he muttered as JD felt the tie tighten around his neck. He started to turn and look back into the mirror, but Perry tightened his grip on the tie. Perry tugged lightly and pulled JD to him. JD felt the other man’s lips softly graze his.  
“Thank you,” JD whispered and they both knew that they’d be in the same position tomorrow morning because JD truly was hopeless at the act, but for once Perry didn’t care.


	2. Chapter 2

Perry stood in the back, taking shots from his flask every time the pain was too much. He was wearing his best black suit and tie, the one he’d worn to Ben’s funeral. I’m losing someone else I love today, he thought as he took another drink. He saw JD welcoming their guests before taking his spot at the front next to Ghandi. He looked happy, probably the happiest Perry had ever seen him.   
He thought back to that night in the on-call room a year ago. He’d pulled Newbie in to yell at him about something and then it happened; JD had looked so flustered and had started worrying his bottom lip when Perry had the overwhelming urge to kiss him. He had almost mustered up the courage to do it too, if it wasn’t for his pager going off from his waistband. He just leaned forward and growled before snapping, “Just stay out of my sight, McKenzie,” as he stalked out of the room.   
Later that day Perry found himself in a supply closest, searching for nothing in particular. He thought back to the way it had seemed that JD had started to lean into him when his pager had gone off. No, that’s ridiculous. Get a hold of yourself, he thought as he hit his head against the shelving. He knew it was impossible for JD to feel the same way when he didn’t even know how he felt about the other man himself. Still, the tiny glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, JD would have kissed him back stayed in the back of his mind. He had hoped that Kim and JD weren’t going to be more serious than any of his other girlfriends, but when JD told him they were getting married, he started to worry. When the invitation arrived in the mail, Perry knew he was too late.  
He hadn’t even noticed that the pianist had started playing and Kim was slowly walking in. JD was looking at her with tears in his eyes and Perry wanted nothing more in the world to have JD look at him like that. He stepped closer into the shadows and took another drink, this time to stop the tears that threatened to fall despite himself. He was going to make it through this without crying if it killed him.   
When the officiant asked, “Does anyone have any objections as to why these two should not be wed,” Perry wanted nothing more than to step forward and tell JD how he really felt.   
“I do,” he said and everyone whipped their heads back toward him. “What, did I stutter? JD, you can’t do this. I-I goddamn it, I love you, Newbie. Have for a long time and we deserve a chance to figure out what this is. Please, don’t do this.”   
JD saw the sea of shocked faces looking back at him and glanced at Kim who just looked pissed. He started walking towards Perry without a second thought and kissed the other man.   
Perry snapped out of his daydream when he heard the officiant say, “You may now kiss the bride.” He felt his heart shatter as he swallowed the last of the scotch he’d had. He felt himself start to sway a little as he stood up straighter when JD and Kim walked by. He gave JD his best, “I’m proud of you, kid,” look and JD beamed as the newlyweds finished their walk down the aisle. I have to get out of here, Perry thought as he suddenly felt sick to his stomach at the absolute adoration on JD’s face when Kim kissed him again. 

-  
“Does anyone have objections as to why these two should not be wed?”   
JD looked around and saw Perry still standing in the back. He’d be lying if a small part of him hadn’t wished that the other man would step up and object. But, he didn’t and when Kim kissed him, he kissed her back like his life depended on it. Even if it felt like a small part of him was dying. 

-

It had become painfully obvious to not only JD and Kim, but everyone around them, that their marriage wasn’t going to last, no matter how hard they’d tried to make it work for Sammy. So when JD showed up at Perry’s apartment late one night, he couldn’t say he was surprised to see the kid. He was soaking wet and shivering from the rain outside. With the glazed look falling over his eyes, Perry suspected JD had indulged in one too many appletinis before coming here.   
“Newbie, what are you doing here,” Perry asked as he ushered JD inside. JD started to answer, but apparently thought better of it and opted for just shrugging his shoulders. “For God’s sake, Sandra, you’re going to get pneumonia and then I’ll be the one taking care of your patients,” Perry ranted as he began searching through his gym bag for some clean clothes for JD, who was still sitting motionless on the couch. “You need to get out of those wet clothes before you get sick, kid,” Perry said quietly as he handed the younger man a pair of sweatpants and one of his Red Wings jerseys.  
“I’m not cold, Dr. Cox,” JD said, but still taking the clothes and walking to the bathroom. While JD was changing, Perry made a pot of coffee.  
When JD returned to the couch, and Perry felt his breath hitch when he saw JD sitting there looking so helpless, Perry thrust a cup of coffee in his hands. “You need to sober up a little so we can have a talk,” he said, sitting down and picking up the book he’d been reading before. They sat in silence as JD seemed lost in thought, but took a drink of coffee every so often and Perry continued reading, stealing glances at JD.   
It seemed like hours before JD’s voice filled the room, “Kim and I broke up. I can’t do it anymore, it’s too hard. We rushed into it, but I wouldn’t trade Sammy for the world-”  
“God, kid, you can’t do this. You have a son now and he needs the both of you to raise him. Apart or together. I mean, honestly, Dorothy, relationships don’t work the way they do in those rom-coms you love so much. A couple that is truly right for each other wades through the same crap as everybody else, but they don’t let it take ‘em down. Someone has to stand up and fight for that relationship. If it’s right, and you’re lucky, one of them will say something. JD, look at me,” Perry said as took JD’s face in his hand and moved it away from the hole JD seemed to staring into his floorboards. “You need to make a choice. Don’t be like me and throw it away.” He said the last part as a whisper, more for himself than for the other man who had sobered up and was staring into his eyes. He knew it was bullshit, he had never stood up and faced his feelings for JD, but JD deserved someone whole. He deserved someone who wasn’t so damaged and didn’t come with their own concierge for all of the emotional baggage. Part of Perry wanted him to call him on his hypocrisy so they could fight and he could push the younger man away forever.  
“You called me JD,” he whispered as Perry put his face in his hands.  
Perry was too deep in his self-loathing to even care anymore. “Of course I did, Jessica. I love you, okay,” he said, his voice muffled by his hands.  
“Why didn’t you ever say anything,” JD asked, and that small, hopeful part of Perry couldn't help but notice the wonder in his voice.   
“Did I fucking stutter? I just did,” he said as he rolled his eyes. He really didn’t want to be having this conversation. Not now, not ever. Maybe when one of them was dead, he’d mull it over.   
Perry hadn’t noticed JD getting closer to him on the couch until he was firmly straddling his lap and kissing him. It took Perry by surprise and he hesitated because if JD was still drunk, he didn’t want him to regret this in the morning. He felt fingers in his hair and then he finally started kissing the other man back. Perry wrapped his arms around JD and pulled them as close as he could to each other.   
When they were both out of breath, JD leaned his forehead against Perry’s, looked into his eyes and said, “I love you too.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An accident victim of JD's makes Perry think about the things he's tried the hardest to forget. Luckily for him, JD is there to hold him together before he can self-destruct.

He was in the lounge, his hands clasped behind his head. His eyes were unfocused and Perry could feel himself sinking lower. He needed a drink. He wanted to fall into the blankness that a bottle of scotch could offer him. He wanted to _forget_.

There had been an accident and the kid’s parents hadn’t made it, but according to the autopsy they had been drinking before they’d gotten behind the wheel. _It was really only a matter of time before this happened_ , JD thought as he began to clean the various cuts and scrapes on the boy’s arms. He looked at the small sleeping figure in the bed. He couldn’t be much older than Jack and his mess of curly, red hair made him wonder what Perry had looked like as a child. JD hadn’t told him about his parents yet, figuring that was something that could wait until social services got here. Aside from the cuts from the glass and a sprained wrist, he wasn’t seriously injured. However, the routine x-ray of his sprained wrist had revealed a much more complicated story. “Oh, God,” JD whispered as he looked at the x-ray. He had multiple healed fractures, far too many for it to be the case of a clumsy child.

“JD, look,” Carla said as she gently pulled at the hem of the boy’s shirt, revealing welts and bruises painting a terrible picture of abuse.

“Why isn’t he on the Pedes floor by now, Cheryl,” Dr. Cox questioned as he strolled into the room, only to stop short when he saw the boy’s back. JD could see the emotion pass over Perry’s face and his jaw clenched. JD knew he was thinking back to his own childhood. “Right. You need to call the social worker,” Perry mumbled as he stalked out of the room. It took everything JD had to not run after him and tell him that everything was okay; that he was loved. But he had a patient and right now, his patient needed him more than Perry. He just hoped Perry would understand later.

 

JD knew they both needed some time away from the hospital. He knew Perry was somewhere spiraling and sinking in a sea of self-doubt, so he worked quickly at getting coverage for them to sneak away for a few hours. He knew Perry’s childhood hadn’t been great and he knew he had spent his life trying to forget what his parents had done to him and his sister, but JD also knew that sometimes your past crept up behind you and left you feeling empty in the wrath of it all. He knew Perry would have a hard time saying it, but JD knew Perry needed him.

JD found Perry on the couch in the lounge, his face in his hands. He softly sat down next to the other man and curled into his side. Perry didn’t say anything, but JD felt his arm around him. “Let’s get out of here,” JD whispered as he kissed Perry’s cheek. He took Perry’s hand in his own and led him out of the hospital and down the street until they reached the park that they brought Jack to sometimes. “Sit with me,” JD said as patted the grass beside him. He knew Perry needed to get it out of his system; he needed to fall apart a little so JD could help put him back together.

“Oh, spare me. I don’t want to sit here and talk about how my mommy and daddy were just _so_ mean to me and how miserable and lonely it made me,” Perry mocked,” I’m _fine_ , JD. I don’t need this. I don’t need to talk about my feelings with my boyfriend. You might have the gift of gab and enjoy spilling your guts to all your girlfriends, but _I don’t_. I’m going back to the hospital.”

He was lashing out and JD knew him well enough to not be upset or think too much about it. He caught Perry’s hand, “Please. Just humor me. I need a break from that place and it’s such a nice day.” He knew Perry wouldn’t leave without him and he also knew that Perry would stay, even if it was under protest and false pretenses, if JD needed him.

“ _Fine_ , but I’m _not_ talking,” Perry said as he sat down next to JD and put his hand over his. JD gave him a small smile as he pulled a book out of his backpack that Perry hadn’t noticed was slung over his arm. Perry knew he was a pain in the ass and that he was a difficult person to love. He looked at the man next to him and felt JD’s love wash over him. JD already knew the darker side of Perry. JD knew he’d had a bad childhood, that he probably drank a little too much, and that he was the most sarcastic son of a bitch on the planet, but JD didn’t care. JD knew all that and loved him in spite of it. JD knew he was closed off, but somehow always knew that Perry would find his way back to JD when he eventually imploded on himself . JD was always there waiting for him with open arms and a smile. He didn’t have to pretend around JD. He sighed and laid his head in JD’s lap. His head was starting to hurt and Perry just wanted to close his eyes for a few minutes. Maybe the pain in his chest would stop too. He thought about Paige and how her God helped her cope. Perry wished he had faith like that. But he had JD and that was close enough to Heaven for him. He started to doze as JD started running his fingers through his hair.

Perry’s eyes started to close and JD could feel his breathing even out as he ran his fingers through the mess of curls. He knew this rest would be short lived, but Perry needed it. JD knew Perry would feel bad about snapping at him later when he had finally started to surface from the suffocating memories that he couldn’t forget, no matter how much scotch he drank or how many walls he put up. JD would always be there when Perry needed somebody to pull him back from the edge. He figured that was what love was really about: letting the other person fall apart sometimes and always being there to help put them back together, to make them whole again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a sequel of sorts to the previous chapter. JD is the one who is stressed and in need of comfort.

     Perry was worried about him and they'd been together long enough that they could tell when the other needed a break from the hospital. Perry tended to destroy anyone or anything that got in his path, but JD was different. For someone who seemed to talk nonstop, Perry knew it was a real problem when the kid just shut down and would barely speak. JD had seemed alright, albeit a little strained, until his last page. Carla found Perry and told him it had been a code and it hadn't gone well. With his coded patient today, JD had lost three patients this week and he knew JD was spiraling into self-doubt. Perry told the resident to cover his and JD’s patients and went up to the roof where he knew JD went to think. He always said the city was at its most beautiful at sunrise; the quiet also helped to silence the deafening loudness of his own thoughts. Perry hated mornings, but the smile on JD’s face when Perry managed to haul his ass out of bed and hold him close while they watched the sun come up made it worth it in Perry’s eyes. 

     He saw JD leaning out and looking at the city.  Perry placed a hand at the small of his back before wrapping his arms around the other man. “Let's get out of here,” he whispered in JD's ear. When JD just wrapped his arms tighter around Perry's waist, Perry rubbed at JD's back before whispering again, “Come on. We're going for a walk. The resident is covering our patients and I give him an hour, maybe two if he manages to grow a pair, before he has a melt down and pages one of us.” 

 

* * *

 

 

     JD made it to the park before he let his emotions take over. Perry sat down in the grass and pulled JD down so he was sitting between Perry's legs. “They came to the hospital for help and I let them  _ die _ because I couldn't figure out what was wrong with them,” JD said in a quiet voice, leaning against Perry's chest. 

     Perry wrapped his arms around JD and held him as tightly as he could. Perry felt his heart breaking for JD. He let his head fall to JD’s shoulder and whispered, “JD, you know that's not true. It wasn't your abilities as a doctor. It was just luck. I know you know that. But I also know what it's like to care; to care too much.” 

     “I don't care anymore, Perry. I  _ can't  _ care anymore. It's starting to be too much,” JD said as he wiped his eyes. 

     “I know and it’s okay. I’m here, just sit here with me and forget about the hospital. Just  _ be _ here with me,” Perry said and pressed a kiss to the back of JD’s neck. “I love you. Always.” 

     “Always,” JD echoed. They sat in silence as they watched the sun rise. Sunlight was warming their faces when their pagers went off. Perry sighed and groaned as he dropped his head to JD’s shoulder. 

     “We should get back,” JD whispered as he leaned more into Perry. 

     “Probably.” Perry’s voice was muffled by JD’s scrub top. 

     Perry helped JD up and as they walked back to the hospital, JD’s constant chatter resumed. Losing patients never really got any easier, but Perry thought JD seemed a little lighter when they walked back through the doors of the hospital.


End file.
